Does anyone read bulletins anymore?

The following extract is taken from a bulletin sent to all my lovely MySpace friends. If you haven’t seen my MySpace page, you can find it at www.myspace.com/deadlamb.

Does anyone even read bulletins anymore?

Well read this one, cos Deadlamb is back and more auspiciously audacious than ever before. Regardless of your surroundings, come slyly masturbate over the new website (now sitting on its own domain!) at www.deadlamb.co.uk

In case none of you remember me, please allow me to provide a brief recap - To most of you, we first became friends a year or so ago. You were attracted to me because of my boner-inspiring logo and trend-haltingly attractive page - I was attracted to you because you seemed either hot, slutty or both.

For a short while, it seemed that nothing could halt the tireless spread of the world’s most famously late farmyard animal. Ultimate, worldly domination was not to be, however, as my legendary laziness found me neglecting my MySpace duties…

I daren’t reveal the depths of depravity and debauchery reached during that period. Just imagine a hunch-backed dwarf disemboweling a family of raccoons whilst drinking neat whisky from the hollowed out fetus of the true descendant of Jesus Christ and getting anally fisted by a half-human, half-rhino hybrid prostitute called Bluebell - you won’t be far wrong.

What I shall reveal is the fact that my website has now been updated and includes a blog and a search engine designed for creative types. Click the linky thing, or I’ll give Bluebell your address.

www.deadlamb.co.uk

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