The latest real-life phenomenon, Gabrtorial!

In case you’ve been living under a rock that has been lined with paint that prevents you from illegally sharing your more modern, rock-dwelling neighbour’s Wi-Fi connection - you will probably be aware of Twitter (and the rest of the ‘micro-blogging’ crowd) by now. In fact, you may even have registered your own account and are probably sat there right now wondering why you bothered.

Despite the contempt we mere humans may hold for such micro-blogging platforms, the potential for spam is tremendous so it looks as though they are here to stay for the time being. Do not despair, fellow life-lovers, as the real world may regain some of its street cred with the introduction of Gabrtorial.

Gabrtorial is micro-blogging for a new generation of Internet users who, when it comes down to it really, would rather not use the bloody Internet to document their entire sodding life. Gabbing is easy, fun and accessible to everyone - you require NO wires, NO electricity and NO computer skills. In fact, you do not even require a computer - it’s that revolutionary! By registering with Gabrtorial you can make new friends, keep up-to-date with the latest events, let others know what you’re doing, and even share music, videos, files and links! How is this possible without an Internet connection? Read on…

What is Gabrtorial?

Gabrtorial is micro-blogging given substance. Although it is currently in invite-only beta stages, there are already enough features to make it stand out from the crowd.

Cool! How do I join?

At the moment, you can’t. Membership is invitation only, so if you don’t know someone who is already a member of Gabrtorial you’ll have to wait until we open ourselves up for public consumption. If you would like to be among the first to be notified when this happens, email Gabrtorial at ineedtogab@gabrtorial.com.

Ok, I guess I’ll have to wait - but what do I get when I finally join?

When you create your Gabrtorial account, you will be sent all the necessary tools needed to begin Gabbing straight away. The starter pack includes a pack of post-it notes (medium), a pen (biro, black) and a username and password. If you would like to upgrade your account and go pro, you will receive two pens (one black, one red), a jumbo-pack of post-it notes and a special, flashing Gabrtorial membership badge. Please note, Gabrtorial has an open API allowing anyone with access to post-it notes and pens to begin Gabbing without the need for for our resource pack - you will still require a username and password however.

Sounds awesome, so how do I Gab?

If you think you are ready to make your first Gab, place the pen and post-it notes on a solid surface (preferably a table) and say your username in a loud and clear voice. Afterwards speak your password under your breath so people around do not hear it. Now you can access your account simply hold the pen with whichever hand you feel most comfortable using and gently place the nib on the post-it notes, increasing pressure until you start to leave a mark. Begin moving your hand, making sure that the pen remains in contact with the post-it, until you have written a coherent sentence. Sign and date the note and then stick it on your wall or object of choice. Well done, you’ve begun Gabbing!

That’s easy - and fun! But can I do more?

Of course, Gabrtorial aims to compete with other micro-blogging platforms by providing a wide-range of features to enhance your offline experience. Although we are still only in private beta, these are the features that are already available:

Reply to Gabs - Seen a Gab that has given you something to say? Simply stick a note underneath it offering your thoughts.

Share files - Want to share music from your favourite band, or a particularly good video you’ve seen? How about a book or ironing board? With Gabrtorial, this can be done with no specialist knowledge and with no clicks. Place the file or object you wish to share in a box, place the box next to a wall or flat surface and position a Gab above the box with an arrow pointing downwards.

Share links - To share a link, write the URL on the post-it note and stick it in some place where they might see it. Depending on the size of your writing, you can also leave a comment saying what you think of it!

Make friends - To make friends using Gabrtorial you simply need to approach a stranger in the street, write a short message on a post-it note and stick it on their back or face as they walk past. By using the cardboard bit on the back of the post-it’s you can keep track of the random people you have harassed!

And more…

As you can see, that’s pretty exciting stuff. I’ve been Gabbing all day and I’m not growing tired of it. I have a few invites ready if anyone is interested in trying this out, just leave me a comment and I’ll email you the link!

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